It's funny what you remember from your childhood...
When I was like 7 or 8 I went to visit my Aunt in NY. (you know who you are) While I was there I learned that she had started dressing up like a bag lady...FOR MONEY. No...REALLY!
People would pay her to dress up as one of those weird old ladies that have no clue what the term "personal space" means. She was paid entertainment for birthday parties! At the time I thought it was one of the most insane ideas I had ever heard! (But then again my aunt wasn't really known for her sanity. )
Here was the kicker for this girlish mind of mine...She'd walk around in her old hat and sing a song (that I think she made up). She called it the Birthday Dirge. Of course I don't remember most of the words but I think it went something like, "Happy birthday. Have a good one. It might be your last one...People dying...People crying..." and so on.
Well I never quite understood why ANY ONE would think like that about a birthday...UNTIL NOW! You see, I'm officially 30!
So here I am one year closer to death. not much wiser than I was last year and feeling very worn out.
I know, I know, it's just one more year. I'm fine with that, but I am not one of those people who really likes to celebrate birthdays in the first place. I don't even tell my children when it is, although my older girls did find out today (thanks JOHN!)
I only remember 2 birthdays that turned out well, and of the two birthday parties I had when I was a child, only one is in my list of "turned out well". (the other "turned out well" involved a German Chocolate cake with that coconut frosting from an aunt in Florida)
Don't believe that my birthday ALWAYS STINK? Well, let's just look at an example, shall we...
Last night: My darling Maggie (22mos) who has a serious fascination for bathtubs, turned the bathtub on in my master bath, plugged the drain, and came downstairs to play with Mommy and Daddy...FOR TWO HOURS!!!!!!
Do you KNOW what two hours of running water can do to an upstairs bathroom!?! After Jed put buckets under all the leaks in our garage he brought up tote and came up to help me and John scoop up the 4 inches of standing water in my bed/bathroom! We're still sloshing in carpet and I can't tell you how many times we've used our carpet shampooer (is that a word) to soak it up!
Did you know that water can leak out of light fixers, air vents, and light switches too?
Please don't ask me the obvious question...Yes I realize how very lucky we are that Maggie didn't slip and fall in the tub and drown! But COME...ON! Guess what I was worrying about and working on most of the day.
I have many other stories of ruined birthdays and reasons why I hate them. I had planned on listing each negative birthday experience I've had, but to be honest, it just makes my brain hurt! I think I'll just silently sulk about the rest of them and just soak in the *bleh!*(couldn't think of a better word) of my special day!
So bring on the Birthday Dirge Aunt Betsie! I'll sing it off key, and out loud, right along with you!
*But then I'll just climb in bed, pull the cover up over my head, and wait for the day to be over!
4 comments:
Erica,
I heard about your bathroom disaster from Stephanie. I am so sorry! And on your birthday no less. I've got to tell you, if it had happened to me it would have been on my birthday. As a mom that's just how they go. I usually stick to cleaning out the closet to celebrate mine! - Stephie's Mom
Happy Birthday Erica! I know what you mean about not liking being 30! I had a particularly hard time with that one as well...I just don't feel as old as I am! I am headed for 32 this coming year...oh joy, oh rapture. Can't wait. Here's hopin' your week gets better!
I'll let you know how I feel about the big 30 in a few years :) Sorry to hear about your bathroom. And i just wanted to say one of my best birthdays (though early) was the surprise party you helped William pull off for me at your house so many years ago. My one and only surprise party..so far anyway :)
Erica, I was really hoping your birthday was going to be a good one! Sorry about the bathroom! I can't believe my baby sister is 30!
I still think Maggie got mixed up somehow and went to the wrong sister! When Jed was 3 and Craig was 2, my upstairs bathroom, that was right over my kitchen flooded. The toilet just kept overflowing. I didn't realize it until it started coming through the kitchen ceiling and soaked all of my art projects that I had been working on for finals week, not to mention all the cabinets, and everything else! (All I can say is that at least it was clean water that was overflowing, and I didn't have carpet!) When I went to check, I found the living room flooding from the waterfall that my stairs had become!
When the maintenance guy came to figure out what was wrong with it, he pulled out a broken water gun that had been flushed and was stopping it up, and then had to put together the stuff in the back of the toilet where the plug stops up the water. Somehow, the top had been, mysteriously, taken off and everything had been taken apart. BUT "Nobody" did it! Hmmmmm
Anyway, eventually, after several hours of mopping and piles and piles of laundry (wet towels) being done, I had the cleanest floors ever! LOL
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